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How many people here have telekenetic powers? Raise my hand. (Emo Philips)

Any girl can be glamorous. All you have to do is stand still and look stupid. (Hedy Lamarr)

Anyone who says he can see through women is missing a lot. (Groucho Marx)

As a child my family's menu consisted of two choices: take it or leave it. (Buddy Hackett)

The only thing that interferes with my learning is my education. (Albert Einstein)

Go to Heaven for the climate, Hell for the company. (Mark Twain)

Because of their size, parents may be difficult to discipline properly. (P. J. O'Rourke)

Behind every great man is a woman rolling her eyes. (Jim Carrey)

I forgot my phone number. Can I have yours? (I. M. Desperate)

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