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I found there was only one way to look thin: hang out with fat people. (Rodney Dangerfield)

Do not worry about avoiding temptation. As you grow older it will avoid you. (Joey Adams)

I distrust camels, and anyone else who can go a week without a drink. (Joe E. Lewis)

I would never die for my beliefs because I might be wrong. (Bertrand Russell)

Cross country skiing is great if you live in a small country. (Steven Wright)

I love Mickey Mouse more than any woman I have ever known. (Walt Disney)

There are only three things women need in life: food, water, and compliments. (Chris Rock)

Fashions have done more harm than revolutions. (Victor Hugo)

My Father had a profound influence on me. He was a lunatic. (Spike Milligan)

 

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